A whole new life...

Since my last post I've gone through a lot of ups and downs with my emotions. I still have my difficult days but I have taken so many steps toward improving my life that it's hard not to feel the happiness eeking out of me a little bit lately.

I am a full-time student in college now and working toward a new career. I attend church regularly and have even volunteered some of my time with a local homeless shelter, having gone through my adviser at school. I have been seeing a counselor, who has helped me deal with things immensely. I can't even put words to how much this woman has helped me... with EVERYthing. I have established much closer relationships with my kids through all of this - they are what matters most to me after all. All in all I feel really good lately. Like I said, I have difficult days every now and again but I am finding it much easier to pull myself out of it lately. Life is good!

So, even though I am really busy lately, I am going to try and get back to regular art journaling and blogging as well. It won't be every day but it also won't go by the wayside for so long again. At least I hope not!

I have still been art journaling when I have time. I just haven't been getting photos of everything and sharing. A lot of it has been very dark and personal, having gone through all of this mess the past six months. Not really something I want to share much of. But that is all going to change soon!

I think that Rhomany meant this for vlogging... not really something I want to do right now. But I thought it might be fun to fill out this little blog meme for the holiday season.

❄ Top 2 Winter Beauty Essentials
    I'm not really huge into beauty supplies lately but for winter I definitely have to have a good lip moisturizer - Carmex or Vaseline to keep it simple and they both work wonders on dry, chapped lips. Also, I tend to get a dry scalp during the winter months so I don't really have a favorite right now but trying different dry scalp shampoo formulas to see what helps. Any suggestions would be appreciated!

❄ Top 2 Winter Fashion Essentials
    LOVE scarves. I knit and crochet so we always have an over-abundance of them here, but lately I love the fashion scarves as well. My daughter wears them ALL the time and I never thought I would but lately I do love them. I get too hot for hats, but I recently bought my first pair of boots in ages and I LOVE them. Not so much for warmth as they are cute... a black pair of slouchy boots and I wear them all the time already! I want a brown pair as well!

❄ What shoes do you tend to wear the most in the winter?
    In the past I have to admit to mostly wearing a cozy pair of sweats and hoodies along with warm fuzzy slippers because I never had to leave my house in the winter as a homemaker. All that has changed so I guess I need to figure it all out, huh?  I still wear the cozies at home but I'm trying to do something a little more presentable when I'm out and about now.

❄ Favorite Winter Accessory
    Once again... scarves... of all kinds now.

❄ Favorite Winter Nail Polish
    I definitely go for the darker reds for winter. Love the darker reds with a little hint of sparkle in them.

❄ Hot Cocoa or Apple Cider?
    Hot cocoa for sure but there's usually a bit of coffee in mine as well.

❄ Favorite Winter Candle?
    Most anything bakey or cozy smelling. I especially love the scent Hot Buttered Rum by Evan's Scent. Heavenly!

❄ Snowboarding or Skiing?
    I prefer not to move at a ridiculous rate of speed going downhill. I'm more of a ski-lodge snowbunny type. I love to watch though!

❄ Have you ever gone Ice Skating? Are you any good or do you FAIL miserably?
    I used to LOVE to ice skate! I went ALL the time when I was a kid. And I used to be really good at it too. Sadly though, I haven't gone for many years. I should remedy that soon :)

❄ Does it snow where you live?
    Yes... but not enough the past several years. I love the winter months. I don't care to drive in it much and I do have to drive more these days... but I love the snow. It makes for those awesome cozy nights at home with a big handmade quilt and a hot mug of something.

❄ Have you ever made a snowman?
    Absolutely! I went outside at 10pm last winter when we had the first major snow that stuck. I didn't care what kind of fool I looked like!

❄ What holiday do you celebrate?
    All! I am a new Christian so I'll definitely be celebrating the birth of Jesus this year but I am just a holiday kind of girl and I don't exclude any of them. I just love the whole Christmas season.

❄ Favorite Christmas/Holiday song?
    I have always loved the song O Holy Night. Especially when seeing it sung live at the holiday concerts we've gone to at the kids' school. Oh when they hit that high note... *sigh*

❄ Favorite Christmas/Holiday movie?
    Elf!!!

❄ What is your favorite winter treat? (candy cane, gingerbread, etc…)
    My mother's recipe that I still make every year - double layer fudge (chocolate and peanut butter). Yum!

❄ If you were to ask Santa for one thing and you were guaranteed to get it, what would it be? (even if you don’t celebrate christmas)
    A decent job and a new home. That's the hardest part of my situation right now is living in limbo until I find those two things.

❄ Do you have anything fun planned for this winter?
    Nothing planned really. Right now I am just taking one day at a time and living with what it brings me. I just hope I get to spend a lot of time with my kids and grandbabies. We've all been SO busy lately that there hasn't been a lot of time for just enjoying each other. That's what I want more than anything.

I WILL return to some kind of normal someday...

My life has changed so much since my last post over a month ago. It was not my intention to abandon my blog so soon but I just haven't felt like sharing anything until now.

Later that very day of my last post, my husband of over 19 years came home late from work and told me our marriage was over and he was in love with someone else. We have had issues in the past and just a year ago, I left him myself but came back after a couple months. I then totally recommitted myself to him and our marriage and knew without a doubt he was the one I wanted to be with and I was willing to do anything to make this marriage work. So I was completely in shock at his revelation. I knew we still had some underlying issues but it never occurred to me that he would ever do such a thing and that there wasn't anything we could work through. Just the day before he claimed to love me with all his heart and I would never be without him. Needless to say, this didn't do much to minimize the shock and devastation I felt.

Anyway, I have not done one bit of artwork since then, nor have I participated much in any of my groups I belong to. That is going to change real soon. I NEED to be creative again. I NEED the support of other people to get through this. My kids have been a wonderful support to me and I am so thankful for that. But I also need to get back to some kind of normal for me. I need to feel like my life will go on... and I know it will. It's just still really hard some days.

There is still a LOT yet to be worked out since I have been a stay-at-home mom to our children and my stepchildren for all these years and I am also without a college education and haven't worked for many years. It will be a long process I'm afraid but I will get through it. I wish I had different news to report but this is my life... like it or not! I am choosing to just deal with the cards I have been dealt to the best of my ability and I'm finally feeling like I can.

The summer is mine!

My son's party was yesterday and the summer is mine now! Well mostly anyway. We have a TON of food leftover so I'm happy to say I will not be cooking this week! It's good food too, if I do say so myself.

Today I will probably be taking the day off from life in general. I am absolutely exhausted. The latter part of last week was extremely busy and hectic as well as emotionally draining for one reason or another. I woke up fairly early today and I feel like I've been run over and then dragged by a truck... no joke! Fibromyalgia, stress/tension, party planning, and lots of heavy lifting are not a good combination. So as much rest and relaxation as I can get are on the agenda for today. If any art can be done from my comfy recliner, then maybe a little of that too. After a day or two of recuperating, life can get back to some kind of normal here and I can try and get caught up on my art workshops.

And here's a 'just because'... Some of my goofy kids and their 'duckface' pose. I hate this stupid pose you see so many on facebook doing in their pictures!! They made me take it!

An artsy kinda weekend

I have managed to do a couple more spreads in my altered art journal this weekend. Yesterday I played with a sort of 'doodle page' using spray inks and stencils and lots of doodling. This was totally inspired by Christy's Eclectic Art Journal class. It's great to have some pages prepared ahead of time and then sit and mindlessly doodle while watching tv in the evenings. I did this one while I was in the middle of a True Blood-athon this weekend.

I had a hard time falling asleep last night so I worked on another drawing of a girl from a magazine. I think there's enough likeness there that you could tell I used it for inspiration. But at the same time it's definitely not a realistic portrait by any means. She turned out kind of somber looking so I made up for that with lots of happy colors and cute flowers made from book pages. What can I say... I like the irony.

I plan on getting back to Rhomany's Portraits 123 class just as soon as I get my son's grad party off the ground next weekend. Until then, I will just continue doing pages like this just for me when I have time this week (which won't be much). I like to be able to sit down and really concentrate on class stuff when I work on it.

I drew something today!!

I know, I can hardly believe it myself. It's been so hectic around here I either haven't had the time or when I have I couldn't muster up the motivation to. I'm taking this weekend off of anything graduation related though and come Monday I'm back at it until after next weekend's party. Then other than babysitting one of the grandpunkins a couple days a week, the summer is mine to play with my art supplies all I want.

Anyway... here is my drawing. I put it in my first altered book journal. It's an old human development text book from the 70's I believe. The first page happened to be totally blank so I didn't do anything to it before I started sketching. Now I'm half afraid to screw it up by trying to paint or color her because I am actually quite pleased with this drawing. I've been going thru old magazines and picking out pictures I like that I might try drawing and this one really caught my eye.

This drawing was JUST for me. Not for any of my many classes and workshops I'm taking and not for any other reason than I just wanted to. I've been kind of stressing myself by allowing myself to feel behind in everything. There are no deadlines for any of these classes and they are all open for whenever I want to work on them. But for some stupid reason I sometimes let myself get all caught up in feeling behind or like I'm letting someone down. Who? You got me! LOL  But no more of that. I'll finish all my classes at some point. Art is to be enjoyed and I'm not going to stress about any of it anymore.


I also did a random page in one of my Eclectic Altered Journals from Christy's class. It's an old catalog. It's mostly collage and doodles and I really enjoyed playing on this one. The images make absolutely no sense together but I liked them all because they were bright and eye-catching.

UPDATE: I decided to play around with a monochromatic background for the girl I drew today. I used doilies for a stencil and and my ink sprays over acrylic. It's in my nature to really goop this up with a lot of stuff but I really think I like this very simple background with her and I like the idea of leaving it just as it is. I'm sure I'll change my mind a dozen more times or so because that is also in my nature! But for now I like this and it just needs some journaling. 

Doodly doo!

The only thing I've managed to work on at all this week art-wise is some doodled painted book pages to use in my journals. Last week I was playing with some of my ink sprays and some stencils and I think some pastels as well and had a bunch ready to play on. My doodles tend to be mostly floral in nature. I've always done that. I will have to see if I can get a little more creative than that sometime.

Otherwise it's just been a little too hectic to actually sit down at the desk and do any real drawing or painting. And I hate it! I just need to get through a few more days and I will actually have time for that once again.Tonight is my son's last ever jazz band concert (he plays the sax). Tomorrow morning is his senior farewell assembly at the school which is usually pretty long. Then Saturday is baccalaureate and graduation... another full day. Sunday is a graduation party for one of my daughter's good friends that she wants me to make an appearance at. Monday.... I don't think I have anything at all for Monday as of yet. Keeping my fingers crossed that it remains that way and if it does I may not even get dressed let alone leave the house! LOL

Until then I will continue to doodle a little bit in the evenings so when I get back at my journal and classes full force I will have something more to work with.

Poor neglected blog...

Yes, I have neglected my blog this past week or so. I have also let my faces slide a little as well. I do hope to catch those up before May is done though. We'll see.

My baby boy is graduating this coming weekend and his graduation party will be in a couple weeks. On top of that I have taken on keeping my youngest grandson a couple mornings a week since my daughter-in-law got herself a new job. This time of year is always crazy busy for us for some reason. No matter what's going on it's just nutso in this house. So if anyone is reading this pitiful little blog, please bear with me for the next few weeks if posts are sporadic. I think once all of the big things are done I will get back to having a lot more me time and playtime for making art (I don't say "arting"... for some reason that just annoys the piss out of me!).

So I don't have a drawn face to share with you today. However I do have one of the best faces on the planet to share with you. This is my granddaughter. It's her birthday today and she is now four years old. I can't believe she's gotten this big already. I know it sounds cliche but it seems like just yesterday I was there in the room with her mommy and daddy the day she was born. I was not prepared for just how much I was going to fall in love with this child. You love your kids, of course. But there is something different when your child has a child and you're now a grandparent. It's a special kind of love that I can't even begin to explain. And now I have a fourth grandchild on the way!

So here is my sweetie being a little ham last night when they came over for birthday celebrations here. She thought she'd be cute and steal my drink and being the grandma that I am I of course picked up the camera instead of correcting the situation. :)

Now this is what I call a face!

Catching up

I've been busy the last couple days again but not so much that I couldn't get a few artsy things accomplished. I played around with a couple faces yesterday. They aren't all that great because I was just quickly sketching on some excess book pages I have from altering a book for Christy's Eclectic Altered Journal class. But at least I'm somewhat caught back up with 29 Faces with face numbers 15 and 16.

I also doodled some flowers and played with my new Prismacolor markers on the book pages. I have a lot to learn with the markers yet. I only have a set of 24 but it's plenty to play with. I really like them so far. I played around with some of my sprays and stencils yesterday too with those book pages. I have SO many book pages I have a lot to mess around with. I will use these in my Eclectic Altered Art Journals... or somewhere.

One more thing I've played with is finishing the couple bound journals I made for my youngest daughter. She keeps a journal now that she's a freshman in college. Just a writing journal. She's not so much into the art thing at this point. But I made a couple coptic bound journals for her with plain copy paper and they turned out awesome. I recycled some boxes for the hard covers and used a roll of white paper I have here for the little ones to play with to cover those with and then used markers to doodle the cover. The second one I left plain for her to decorate herself. I am so tickled with how they turned out and want to make some for myself as well.

I'm not sure what it is about binding my own books that I love so much but I adore the process. I could easily just keep making them and end out with way more books than I'll ever get through so I guess I have to find more people to make them for!

The next thing I need to catch myself up with is Rhomany's Portraits class and the latest Art Geeks prompt. I've fallen behind again. I think that catches the blog up for now. I should be able to get some play time this weekend to do some more before next weekend's big graduation craziness. My baby is graduating. The last one! I can hardly believe it.

Time for Art today

The past couple days have been really hectic here so I unfortunately fell a little deeper into my rut but it was beyond my control. I don't even recall Wednesday anymore... but I know it was busy. Yesterday I had my youngest grandson all morning and minutes after he left early afternoon, my oldest daughter came for a visit with the other two monkeys. And let me tell ya... they were wound up! It was nonstop crazy play until evening. One discovery I've had in this is that I am SO glad I had my kids when they were young because Holy Jeebus!! I couldn't do this every day anymore!By evening I was just plain worn out!

The plan for today was that I was supposed to take my mother-in-law to the airport an hour away for a trip she's taking for the summer. I am SO happy to say that I am off the hook for that now. I was gladly going to take her but since she knows I am not all that comfortable driving in the bigger cities when someone offered to take her that used to live up there she took them up on it. So instead of being gone all day like I first thought, the day is mine! Comfy pants, lots of coffee and some art time here I come! I'll have something to share by the end of today even if it kills me!

Face 14

I completely forgot to post yesterday. I'm in a bit of a rut this week I think. I haven't had much motivation for journaling, painting, drawing, or anything else for that matter. Not really sure what's up with that but trying to dig myself out of it. I have really mostly been drawing homework faces for my Portraits 123 class and counting them as my 29 Faces. It works but it's certainly not much.

Sometime today the Eclectic Altered Art Journals class is supposed to start so I'm hoping having some nice new places to play will inspire me to draw and paint a little more than I have this week. I'm also going to try and work on the latest Art Geeks prompt soon and hopefully that will inspire me too. Until then... here's the little bit of effort I could muster up.